the real you

if one has to describe onself how would one do it?? we behave differently with different people simply because if you have to talk to someone who's not like you (more often than not thats the case) you have got to attune yourself to that person's thinking or vice versa. Individiualists might argue that they'd rather not talk to such people but i think one is able to make this decision only when the so called thought process in a person begins.what about relatinships that were established before this thought process began? its not necessary that you feel the same way now and almost wonder at times-all those moments of bliss that you experienced when you were young;what was the basis of it all??? today when you have started thinking,you cannot fathom how you even had a sort of relationship with that person.its too late to do anything about it now so you go on behaving a though it were all the same but deep down there is that voice screaming- this isnt you! when you return to "your" world of intellect and sanity and try to feel relieved,you feel the guilt instead.yet again it is your mind telling you that you had a good time after all.......so where is the consistency? where is this real you that you are so proud of?? where is the source of the thought process that you think makes you the kind of person you are? the values so dear to you..where did they come from? my issue here is the quest for the abstract that makes you "an individual" but..... does the concept exist?is man just a culmination of used and abused ideas and ideals? what is this intangible that he calls "mind" that essentially defines his existence? that which makes him different from the primates and the like.is it nothing but a cluster of advanced cells that he possesses? is there anything that he can call "his own" that has not previously originated...so what is this concept of originality? our thoughts are guided by a lot of things-our experiences,knowledge.the books we read......so is it fair to even claim that you thought of something ORIGINAL? i dont think it is.......i'd end by quoting this line from a poem- we are part of all that we meet
-alfred lord tennyson