I thought I had learnt this by now. Clearly not.
Stupidity is not only tolerated but also celebrated and felicitated.
Forgive me if I don't join the party.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Friday, February 13, 2009
Sexism - the has been of a nation that doesn't want to know it
What is with the obsession of portraying men as having the liberty to stray? This question disturbs me at a lot of levels but I'll just stick to the simplest one. The advertisements in this country have touched the nadir of crassness. How many ads do we have floating around that say a man flirting with many women at the same time is pretty cool and smart? And how most women are credulous enough to buy anything that the pretty cool and smart guy says? May be it is true, but still… or may be I’m being cynical. Either way, that's not the point.
Alright, agreed that this is not gender specific. There are prototypes of both species. But in India, at least, the bias is towards men. It's OK to get away with a lot of things if you are man; a woman in the same position is definitely not as lucky. The point is not to discuss morality. The issue is the subtle, and in some cases not-so-subtle, exhibition of sexism in our society.
In the urban world, sexism is a fine example of the elephant in the room. No one wants to acknowledge it. Men don’t want to acknowledge that they withheld a female employee’s promotion/career opportunity because she got married or is pregnant. Women don’t acknowledge that they got a hike because they belonged to the prettier lot (versus not-so-pretty women), or that they dint get yelled at for a goof up because they are women.
In the same urban world, most people refuse to accept the perception that a philandering man is actually referred to as a guy who many women want to be with. So poor thing, how can he help that he’s so charming? But a philandering woman is actually someone who gets around a lot and is easy to get into the sack with. So if you want an easy lay, you know where to go. The same is true for the man, but is never said of him. And it is never acknowledged that a guy who is good with his job is good but a woman needs to be exceptional at her job to be “good.”
And that’s the problem. The fact that men and women (I still say men, mostly) are choosy in deciding when they want to be liberal and when they want to shrug off their selfishness and sexist beliefs as “just the way things are” is quite shocking.
I mean, look at the Hindi movies. Sexism has been a staple for years now and is clearly a non-issue. To most people who watched a stupid movie called “Rab Ne Banadi Jodi,” it didn’t even occur that the movie, apart from insulting our intelligence, is being supremely sexist in portraying that an educated woman, albeit a small-town resident, lacks the basic sense to identify her husband without a moustache. Or even that, the very same husband does not so much as bother apologizing when his wife discovers that he was actually conning her by acting like he was somebody else just to test if she would stray or not. I mean, really?
So by the same token, do we project in our movies that a woman trying to “con” her husband by giving her alter ego shorter hair or a different style of dressing gets away with it? That he buys the fact that she is this whole new and different person altogether?
I don’t think so. And this movie is just one example I can think of from the top of my head. Sexism is so deep rooted in our heads, society and culture that people who indulge in it or people victimised by it don’t even realise most of the time. It’s just acceptable because it has been happening for so long. And because we have forgotten to question why some of us are entitled to liberties that many others are not. Why pub-going women are beaten up and not men or why it’s OK if men work long hours and take their job seriously while for women it’s just “attaching too much importance to your work” when “It’s just a job.” It all comes down to the same thing. An archaic mindset that is supposedly our culture. And the fact that it is so darn convenient to go on continuing this culture.
And India is going to be a super power and an epitome of modernity in the next 20 years, when the country is not even willing to move beyond mistakes that were made generations ago. What a joke.
Alright, agreed that this is not gender specific. There are prototypes of both species. But in India, at least, the bias is towards men. It's OK to get away with a lot of things if you are man; a woman in the same position is definitely not as lucky. The point is not to discuss morality. The issue is the subtle, and in some cases not-so-subtle, exhibition of sexism in our society.
In the urban world, sexism is a fine example of the elephant in the room. No one wants to acknowledge it. Men don’t want to acknowledge that they withheld a female employee’s promotion/career opportunity because she got married or is pregnant. Women don’t acknowledge that they got a hike because they belonged to the prettier lot (versus not-so-pretty women), or that they dint get yelled at for a goof up because they are women.
In the same urban world, most people refuse to accept the perception that a philandering man is actually referred to as a guy who many women want to be with. So poor thing, how can he help that he’s so charming? But a philandering woman is actually someone who gets around a lot and is easy to get into the sack with. So if you want an easy lay, you know where to go. The same is true for the man, but is never said of him. And it is never acknowledged that a guy who is good with his job is good but a woman needs to be exceptional at her job to be “good.”
And that’s the problem. The fact that men and women (I still say men, mostly) are choosy in deciding when they want to be liberal and when they want to shrug off their selfishness and sexist beliefs as “just the way things are” is quite shocking.
I mean, look at the Hindi movies. Sexism has been a staple for years now and is clearly a non-issue. To most people who watched a stupid movie called “Rab Ne Banadi Jodi,” it didn’t even occur that the movie, apart from insulting our intelligence, is being supremely sexist in portraying that an educated woman, albeit a small-town resident, lacks the basic sense to identify her husband without a moustache. Or even that, the very same husband does not so much as bother apologizing when his wife discovers that he was actually conning her by acting like he was somebody else just to test if she would stray or not. I mean, really?
So by the same token, do we project in our movies that a woman trying to “con” her husband by giving her alter ego shorter hair or a different style of dressing gets away with it? That he buys the fact that she is this whole new and different person altogether?
I don’t think so. And this movie is just one example I can think of from the top of my head. Sexism is so deep rooted in our heads, society and culture that people who indulge in it or people victimised by it don’t even realise most of the time. It’s just acceptable because it has been happening for so long. And because we have forgotten to question why some of us are entitled to liberties that many others are not. Why pub-going women are beaten up and not men or why it’s OK if men work long hours and take their job seriously while for women it’s just “attaching too much importance to your work” when “It’s just a job.” It all comes down to the same thing. An archaic mindset that is supposedly our culture. And the fact that it is so darn convenient to go on continuing this culture.
And India is going to be a super power and an epitome of modernity in the next 20 years, when the country is not even willing to move beyond mistakes that were made generations ago. What a joke.
Friday, February 06, 2009
So, the day to proclaim our love for our fellow beings is round the corner. But welcome to India, the recently converted fascist country, where if you are caught on a date, you have to marry the person immediately! Whoever said India was one of the largest democracies?
India is now ruled by men clad in "traditional" attires, with a dash of saffron and vermilion. Men who uphold Indian "culture," which is so pure, sanctimonious and immaculate that it will make the rest of the world cringe with shame. Don't be misguided by reports that India ranks among one of the most corrupt countries in the world. No sir. I belong to a country where smoking, drinking, making merry and communicating with species of the other gender is unheard of. India is so busy playing holier-than-thou that we citizens hardly have time to devote to petty issues like population explosion, corruption, terrorism and potential wars.
Our rulers here are blessed with foresight and based on this virtue our guardians are defining womanhood. The new-age definition. Women are bred for domestic purposes, whose primary goal in life is to... yes! You guessed that one, make chapattis! Now how can this be disputed? Of course, women cannot be naive enough to think they were born for a greater cause. I’d be shocked if they happen to think so. It is our moral duty to serve these valorous men who have taken it upon themselves to “preserve” such a glorious culture.
A culture, where, according to our epics and myths – which are the source of most beliefs and virtues in this country – women wore clothes that were more enticing than your average low-waist jeans and a tee, indulged in alcohol, had children outside marriage or from "divine" men who were not their husbands, and in general, had a penchant for adventure.
Alright, I have exhausted my sarcasm. But really, what the hell is going in this country? I don’t give a damn about Valentines’ day but when you tell me that if I’m caught on that day with a guy by my side, then I’ll be married off to him immediately by men with turmeric who have nothing better to do in life, that’s incentive enough to take part in the celebration.
Is it me or have people forgotten that we are in 2009 and not the era of temptresses, god-women or damsels in distress?
I’m in a country, and specifically in a state, where the government is incapable of protecting me if I get beaten up by a bunch of goons. After all, I’m not in the kitchen wearing an apron. And who is fighting for my rights? A loud-mouth called Renuka Chowdhury, whose brilliant idea is to beat up those who beat us. Yes. Fabulous. Let’s just slip back into the Stone Age, shall we?
If I have to take the law into my hands because I’m being unfairly beaten up for visiting a pub and having a drink, then why the hell do we need a government, law and order and a civil society?
What are the authorities doing? If you can’t save me from thugs within this country, how can I trust that my government has the ability to protect me from thugs who don’t belong here? If these guys, our supposed guardians, have so much pent-up aggression, I suggest they join the armed forces or anti-terrorist squads. If they want to protect me, I’d much rather they did that.
And all around I hear people talking about it; almost everyone’s making noise about the issue. Except the government. The placidity is appalling. We are so obviously slipping into a state of lawlessness; it’s absolutely disconcerting. And if our elected government does not do anything now, then the whole institution, I think, will become pointless and farcical – if it hasn’t already become so, that is. I see no purpose for it to exist. If we can let this pass, we can let anything pass.
Meanwhile, I’m pissing in my pants (exactly what the Ram Sene workers desire from “bad” girls like me) thinking about how I could have dared to write this post and articulate my thoughts, and worse, doing so wearing a pair of denims and a tee-shirt! I better rush!! I think I burnt the chapattis!!!
India is now ruled by men clad in "traditional" attires, with a dash of saffron and vermilion. Men who uphold Indian "culture," which is so pure, sanctimonious and immaculate that it will make the rest of the world cringe with shame. Don't be misguided by reports that India ranks among one of the most corrupt countries in the world. No sir. I belong to a country where smoking, drinking, making merry and communicating with species of the other gender is unheard of. India is so busy playing holier-than-thou that we citizens hardly have time to devote to petty issues like population explosion, corruption, terrorism and potential wars.
Our rulers here are blessed with foresight and based on this virtue our guardians are defining womanhood. The new-age definition. Women are bred for domestic purposes, whose primary goal in life is to... yes! You guessed that one, make chapattis! Now how can this be disputed? Of course, women cannot be naive enough to think they were born for a greater cause. I’d be shocked if they happen to think so. It is our moral duty to serve these valorous men who have taken it upon themselves to “preserve” such a glorious culture.
A culture, where, according to our epics and myths – which are the source of most beliefs and virtues in this country – women wore clothes that were more enticing than your average low-waist jeans and a tee, indulged in alcohol, had children outside marriage or from "divine" men who were not their husbands, and in general, had a penchant for adventure.
Alright, I have exhausted my sarcasm. But really, what the hell is going in this country? I don’t give a damn about Valentines’ day but when you tell me that if I’m caught on that day with a guy by my side, then I’ll be married off to him immediately by men with turmeric who have nothing better to do in life, that’s incentive enough to take part in the celebration.
Is it me or have people forgotten that we are in 2009 and not the era of temptresses, god-women or damsels in distress?
I’m in a country, and specifically in a state, where the government is incapable of protecting me if I get beaten up by a bunch of goons. After all, I’m not in the kitchen wearing an apron. And who is fighting for my rights? A loud-mouth called Renuka Chowdhury, whose brilliant idea is to beat up those who beat us. Yes. Fabulous. Let’s just slip back into the Stone Age, shall we?
If I have to take the law into my hands because I’m being unfairly beaten up for visiting a pub and having a drink, then why the hell do we need a government, law and order and a civil society?
What are the authorities doing? If you can’t save me from thugs within this country, how can I trust that my government has the ability to protect me from thugs who don’t belong here? If these guys, our supposed guardians, have so much pent-up aggression, I suggest they join the armed forces or anti-terrorist squads. If they want to protect me, I’d much rather they did that.
And all around I hear people talking about it; almost everyone’s making noise about the issue. Except the government. The placidity is appalling. We are so obviously slipping into a state of lawlessness; it’s absolutely disconcerting. And if our elected government does not do anything now, then the whole institution, I think, will become pointless and farcical – if it hasn’t already become so, that is. I see no purpose for it to exist. If we can let this pass, we can let anything pass.
Meanwhile, I’m pissing in my pants (exactly what the Ram Sene workers desire from “bad” girls like me) thinking about how I could have dared to write this post and articulate my thoughts, and worse, doing so wearing a pair of denims and a tee-shirt! I better rush!! I think I burnt the chapattis!!!
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